kids!!#@*
AAargh! Had a huge blow up with my daughter this morning, before school. Whenever we knock heads she becomes a rock and I become a hammer. Not pretty. And then my husband got involved, even worse, a whole house of angry people before 8am in the morning! Poor Alex (my son, age 5) he just kept very quiet, eyes wide...
My daughter has a bit of a wee-wee problem, she's 8, so she should have grown out of it by now, but I suspect it mat be beyond her control (weak bladder muscles?) anyway, her school clothes were smelling like wee, and I told her to change. That's when the sh*t hit the fan. She has a very strong will (gee, I wonder where she gets that from) and she decided that she couldn't smell the urine, so I must be making it up.
Well, to cut a long story short, Ant ended up taking my son to school while I stayed home with Micaela who by now was in absolute hysterics. I was almost in tears myself, what to do with a child who just catagorically will not listen to reason? I had a choice between thrashing her (which would have made things worse, believe me) or bailing out and phoning my mom. Thank God for Grans! If I was a hammer to Micaela's rock, my mom was warm water, and my little girl melted, calmed down immediately. She then changed into clean clothes and could eventually be driven to school.
Of course I'm left feeling absolutely shattered. Isn't it awful how as a parent you end up taking full emotional responsability for almost everything?
One thing I do know is that when Micaela starts to harden and get obstinate its completely useless to use anger or force to try and change her will.
So I must look at my base reactions, and try remind myself in time not not lose it. Parenting is sooo difficult sometimes.
My daughter has a bit of a wee-wee problem, she's 8, so she should have grown out of it by now, but I suspect it mat be beyond her control (weak bladder muscles?) anyway, her school clothes were smelling like wee, and I told her to change. That's when the sh*t hit the fan. She has a very strong will (gee, I wonder where she gets that from) and she decided that she couldn't smell the urine, so I must be making it up.
Well, to cut a long story short, Ant ended up taking my son to school while I stayed home with Micaela who by now was in absolute hysterics. I was almost in tears myself, what to do with a child who just catagorically will not listen to reason? I had a choice between thrashing her (which would have made things worse, believe me) or bailing out and phoning my mom. Thank God for Grans! If I was a hammer to Micaela's rock, my mom was warm water, and my little girl melted, calmed down immediately. She then changed into clean clothes and could eventually be driven to school.
Of course I'm left feeling absolutely shattered. Isn't it awful how as a parent you end up taking full emotional responsability for almost everything?
One thing I do know is that when Micaela starts to harden and get obstinate its completely useless to use anger or force to try and change her will.
So I must look at my base reactions, and try remind myself in time not not lose it. Parenting is sooo difficult sometimes.
posted by Gaelin at 9:52 AM
3 Comments:
ahhhh..motherhood is just grand, isn't it?? your girl child sounds exactly like my Elizabeth...she doesn't have the "wee" problem, but she is as stubborn as a mule..we butt heads constantly, and its not just me..shes the same way w/ her grandma and her dad..we call her the devils spawn..lol..mean, I know, but god, she can be sooo impossible...and as for the wee problem, it happens..my one nephew is 16..17 in August, and he still has the occasional problem....doctors have found nothing physically wrong, they say (after a sleep study) that he just sleeps TOO hard, and doesn't wake himself up...anyways.. stay strong, and remember...yes, your a mom, and are supposed to remember to not lose it, but the truth is, first and formost, your a HUMAN, and humans make mistakes...happens to the best of us...lol..trust me...
anyways...hope you have a great day...take care girl
:)Just me
Thanks Kirsten, i guess all mothers everywhere can relate :) And yes, in the end we're all human...
Have a great weekend
You might like a book I just finished reading - "Momma Zen" - by a Soto Zen priest with a pre-schooler. It's like Brain, Child in that I laughed and cried in every chapter just about. She hasn't got an 8 year old, so it's no practical advise, but it's a good quick read. I find Zen and parenting (I'm a stay at home dad) to be mutually reinforcing, shall we say. Certainly parenting offers the opportunity to see your own reality in action, over and over again. Perhaps not quite as tedious as zazen but perhaps :)
And the anger - what an opportunity. They keep talking about just observing strong emotions run through your body - a day with a maniac child offers far better practice than a day of zazen with even the twitchiest sitters.
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